I went to bed that night thinking that there wouldn’t be anything new happening. That the next day I would wake up with no progress in Jaxson arriving. I was huge, uncomfortable, exhausted, and miserable. I woke up to go to the bathroom, like I normally would 8-12 times in the middle of the night, feeling a little weirder than normal, but nothing that made me question or be concerned. When I went back to bed it was about 4:30am and I couldn’t lay down. It hurt my bad horribly. So I sat on the edge of the bed for a few minutes. I knew that I was having contractions, but I figured they were just the Braxton-Hicks contractions. The only thing that was really different about them, though, was that they were in my lower back and hips, instead of my stomach.

I decided that it was time I started to time them on my phone. Nothing major was happening, so I didn’t wake up Brenden. I knew that if it was time, that he would need to get as much sleep as he needed, because I would need him sooner than later. I timed the contractions for about 30 minutes. At first they were about 7 minutes a part, then very shortly after about 3 timings, they went to 3-5 minutes a part. I knew it was time to wake Brenden up. I was getting a little anxious because I had never done this before and didn’t know if it was real, BECAUSE the contractions were not in my stomach. I never knew that someone could have back labor before then.

I woke Brenden up and he sat there with me for a couple more contractions, and we timed those. I felt them getting much stronger and told him that it was time to wake up my mom. He hurried to the other bedroom and woke her, and she came in to check on me. I remember she asked how I was doing, if I was okay, and just watched me with her eyebrows raised and smiling, knowing what was going on. I remember seeing the excitement in her face! 🙂 By now, I was somewhat hungry, and was slowly waddling out to the front room. I ate a granola bar (I think?) and was shortly on my hands and knees, deep breathing. (PS – We decided to do an all natural, home birth, in our little apartment. 😀 In case you were wondering why I was still at home and not on my way to the hospital…) Brenden asked my mom if she thought that he needed to call our midwife, Valerie. He did, and she got a hold of her assistant to head our way, because 1) I was in labor, and 2) she lived a few minutes closer to us than our midwife.

My labor kicked in hard and fast. Before my midwife’s assistant got to our place, I was breathing hard and couldn’t hardly move from my position. My labor progressed very quickly for a first timer (or so I’m told). Brenden and my sisters were working on setting up the birthing pool in our dining room and my mom was trying to help me stay calm and breathe slow and deep. Klarisa (the midwife assistant) was also trying to help me when my mom was busy with helping get things cleaned up and ready for the baby to come. (My brother was told to stay in the bedroom because we didn’t want him getting scared or passing out. He doesn’t do well with anything that is related to blood. He takes after me. Haha!) When Valerie arrived, almost everything was set up and ready to go. From the time that Klarisa got there until Valerie arrived, my labor had become more intense. They kept up with checking baby’s heart rate and my blood pressure, and all the other procedures, to make sure everything was okay.

When the birth pool was ready and filled, they helped me into it to help finish laboring and deliver in it. I’m honestly not sure what time it was by then because, well…. I was in labor!! I knew at least a couple hours had gone by. My contractions were strong enough that I was pushing. I had Brenden give me 2 blessings during my labor. I don’t remember much of what was said during the first one, except that my Savior and Father in Heaven loved me very much and they wanted me to remember the sacrifice my Savior went through for me. He knew that I was in physical pain and if I remembered Him, that He would help me through it and I would be made stronger in the end of it. The second blessing I remember that I was told my whole home was filled, beyond capacity, with angels and family members and friends from the other side of the veil. That they were so excited for the arrival of this baby, and the absolutely amazing things he would do in his life here on earth. I also remember feeling my mom holding my hand, as I cried through some of the contractions, and crying herself, telling me after the blessing that she knew my Great Grandpa and Grandma Kelly were there, on the other side of the veil. She told me that he was helping give me a blessing with other loved ones that had passed on, and with angels. I immediately had peace rush through my body and I began crying with my heart full of love and thanks!

During my laboring, I remember pushing so hard and for what felt like forever. I thought that my water had already broken, and that I almost had my baby’s head out! But no. That was so far from what I thought. In fact, my water had not yet broken. I was in full, hard core labor and it was still fully intact! I only know this because when it did break, I felt a “pop” and a HUGE sense of relief. But, what I DID think at first was that it was my baby’s head. Then I heard everyone saying they were so proud of me for breaking my water with that huge push! I was in shock and honestly a little mad that it was only the water that had broken. I truly thought that I had passed that point a long time ago.

Once the water broke though, labor only intensified and I hit the transition phase of labor. I kept telling myself, in my head, that I wanted the pain to go away and that I wanted the epidural. Then I would fight and get mad at myself for even thinking that! I was stronger than that! I knew what I wanted and that was to have my baby all naturally! God blessed me to be able to have this child. He also blessed me to be strong enough to birth him without having some pain medication that would make the WHOLE feeling go away. I WANTED to feel it all! I wanted to feel when my baby’s head had emerged. I wanted to feel every contraction because I knew it meant that I was *that much closer* to him being born. It was hard. By far, the hardest thing I have EVER done! But, I knew that I could do it and that I was strong enough to.

Brenden was such an amazing support and trooper throughout this whole thing. He got in the pool and held me up under my arms. He was hunched over, because he is so tall and I am so…not tall. I hung from his arms. My whole weight (including the baby’s and the amniotic fluid) depended on him holding me up. During the middle of one of my contractions, I remember telling him how sorry I was for him and holding me up. I felt so bad that his back was aching from holding all my 148lbs up.I apologized and asked him to forgive me. Everyone kind of laughed and told me that I had nothing to be sorry for and to not worry about it. I was giving BIRTH! I still felt bad, but decided that was not what I needed to be focused on.

About a half hour or so before Jaxson came into the world, my midwife had me get out of the birth pool because of something that she was a little concerned about. Thankfully, there was nothing to worry about in the end! 🙂 She had me lay down on the floor and push even if I didn’t have a contraction. The reason why? Because he decided that if he was going to come out of me, that he was bringing part of me with him! He had his hand CLUTCHING the umbilical cord up by the top of his head. This made it EXTREMELY hard for me to push him out. As he was coming out, my midwife, Valerie, had to help pull his arm out before the rest of him could come out too! I gave one last, hard push and he came out! He was immediately placed on my chest and wrapped in my arms. OH! I should add too, Brenden was the one who caught him when he came out! 😀 He was SO happy and excited to be a part of his birth!!

Jaxson Leon Barton was born on Sunday, October 26, 2014, at 10:38a.m. It was seriously the biggest sigh of relief, that I was done pushing him out of me. As soon as he was placed on my chest, I took in his warmth and smell and fell so deeply in love with him! He immediately started crawling up my chest to start nursing. He was so smart right from the beginning! He filled holes in my heart that I never knew I had. He was so perfectly beautiful! I knew that Heavenly Father had placed one of his most beloved sons in my arms, to raise and love and teach. To help guide him back to his Father in Heaven. I will forever be grateful for such a wonderful and most perfect blessing. Jaxson became my world that very second he was born and placed in my arms. No one could ever take that or him away from me.

Today, he is a crazy, happy, fun, loving, exciting, daring, demanding, beautiful, perfect 12 months and 2 weeks old boy. He is Brenden’s and my life. We are SO happy to be his parents! He has helped us grow in so many ways. We have learned so much about ourselves and each other. He helps us learn how to be more loving and patient. We are so grateful Heavenly Father has blessed us with Jaxson. He is the best thing that has ever happened to us.

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For those of you who are waiting to have children because of finances or school, or any other reason, I am here to tell you that it truly and honestly is not worth it to wait to have kids of your own. They will bless your lives beyond what you can even comprehend! You will never be able to “afford” having children, but somehow it ALWAYS works out. Heavenly Father will help you to take care of you kids! He will also help you draw closer to your spouse. He will help your love for one another grow SO much stronger. I promise you, your lives will be blessed beyond your wildest dreams. You will have such a joy that you’ve never had before. And let me tell you, it feels dang good! I wouldn’t trade being a mommy for anything in the world! Its the best thing I could have ever asked for!

I hope you all enjoyed my story of Jaxson’s birth. It was one of the most spiritual and uplifting experiences I’ve ever had. It was perfect and beautiful. Thanks for reading it!

With love,

Jessica

First, again, I have to apologize. I haven’t been as consistent with writing posts as I had planned and wanted to in the first place. Please bare with me! 🙂

Yesterday, my baby boy turned 10 months old! How crazy is that?!?! I swear that it was literally yesterday that he was born and in my arms for the first time ever. It is absolutely thrilling, and at the same time scary as heck at how quickly time has flown by. He is so smart, big, strong, happy, loving, exciting, daring, observant, smiley, quiet, and so much more. He has completed my husband and I in ways we never realized we could be completed.

For those of you who are trying to have children, are currently pregnant, and/or have kids of your own and want more but may be scared, etc… know that you are amazing! God knows the desires of your heart and has a plan in store for you. Your wants are just as important to Him as they are to you. If you have been trying to conceive, don’t give up. Pray to Heavenly Father and tell him the desires of your heart and what it means to you. Listen with your heart, mind, and spirit to the things that He tells you. He will not leave you without an answer. If you are currently pregnant, congratulations on your bundle of joy! You have been entrusted with one of God’s special spirits to love, nurture, teach, and care for. You are AND will be amazing parents! If you want more children or aren’t sure yet, also pray unto your Father in Heaven. He will help you know if/when to have another child. You will know when the time is right and when your family is complete.

I hope as you read my pregnancy story that you are able to enjoy it and possibly find answers to questions that you might have. If there are questions that you still have unanswered, please feel free to message me! I would love to help you. 🙂

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(Because this post is so long, I am going to continue my birth story in my next post. Be sure to stay tuned!!!)

February 14, 2014 was the day that Brenden (my husband) and I found out that we were pregnant. It was a short 6 weeks of being married before we knew that we were becoming parents! I feel I had it pretty easy during my first trimester, when it came to morning sickness. Before we found out we were having a baby, I went home from work not feeling so well, a couple times. I thought that I had just caught some sort of bug. It wouldn’t have surprised me much because it was winter and cold outside. After we got the positive on the test, it all made sense. A few weeks went by and that was all my morning sickness consisted of, just a little bit of an upset stomach. (I’ve had several moms tell me how lucky I was and how jealous they were.) One day we decided to make some bean and cheese burritos with the store bought tortillas. I already wasn’t feeling the greatest, but was super hungry, so I didn’t think much about my stomach not feeling well. I couldn’t eat the whole burrito. The tortilla tasted disgusting and the texture was awful. I went to lay down on my bed and try to relax, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that I needed to run to the toilet, so I did. I’m sure you can guess the next part… That was the only time throughout my whole pregnancy that I threw up. I was just about to start my second trimester, and the morning sickness got better after that night over the toilet. 😛

I was 15 weeks along when Brenden and I moved from our home town to college town, so he could go to school and get his bachelors degree, then later on go to med. school. I didn’t have any OBGYN, midwife, doctor, etc, to do checkups on me and baby. (I told Brenden before we got married that I wanted to have homebirths with a midwife, and thankfully, he was completely fine with it!) I had no clue where to start looking for a midwife. I ended up finding different pages on facebook with information about midwifes in my area and shortly after found the most amazing and sweet midwife ever!

Fast forward to 19 weeks along… We got our first (and only) ultrasound done. In this we found out the health of the baby was great as well as the gender. But, we made sure to have the tech to keep the gender a secret from us so we could be surprised with our families. We went to our hometown and did a small, family, gender reveal party, and found out that we were going to have a boy! Long story short… I really wanted a girl. So badly. When I found out we were having a boy, I struggled with it. It took me over a month to really be okay and happy about it. It didn’t take much longer than that and I was so excited and looking at all of the baby boy clothes.

One day, at 34 weeks along, I was really uncomfortable. I figured I was just having Braxton Hicks contractions and that my body was out of alignment. I kept moving and adjusting myself to get more comfortable. It would happen on and off throughout the day. I would be fine for a bit, then it would hit me again. That night, I knew something was not right. I wasn’t worried or scared. I just knew something was off. I had Brenden call my midwife and she came over right away. She checked for several things. I wasn’t dilating, but I was contracting hard. She thought that I might have an infection, tested for what she could, and nothing was making sense. Her best advice was to have me go to the hospital, just to be sure. We went to the ER and they took us up to the L&D, took some more tests, put a heart monitor on my belly, stuck an IV in me to start some fluids, and a whole bunch of other stuff. We went in at 10pm and didn’t hear anything until almost 2am. My contractions were getting stronger and harder and longer. I was going into early labor. When the doctors and nurses started telling me what was going on, my fears began to set in. I asked my husband for a blessing. I was in tears. It was too early for my baby to come. What had I done wrong to go into early labor and end up in the hospital in the middle of the night, hooked up to a ton of monitors and an IV? I didn’t want my baby to come so early and be stuck in the hospital for several weeks to a couple months. The doctors ended up giving me something in the IV to help slow and stop the contractions. I can’t remember the name of it though. They told me that the first round of this stuff should help them get easier and possibly stop. It ended up taking another 4 times of putting this stuff in my IV to get my contractions to stop. We didn’t get any sleep until about 6am that morning.

When the morning nurse and doctor came into my room, they told me that I was extremely dehydrated. They said that this was the main cause of the contractions starting up and getting more consistent. The other reason why the contractions were happening was because I had a bad UTI. (Weird though, because my midwife couldn’t find any signs of one and I had no symptoms…) They checked me that morning to make sure I hadn’t dilated during the night or that morning. Thankfully I didn’t. Baby boy was still as snug and as healthy as could be. I thought that I had been drinking plenty of water, but learned that I needed to be drinking A LOT more than what I thought. Later that day we were sent home.

40 weeks along and still no baby. I was miserable. My whole body ached. I was exhausted. One day before I was 41 weeks, I went to a holistic conference not far from where I live. My mom was speaking at it and I wanted to see her and support her.
(She, both of my sisters, and my younger brother were staying with us for several days for this conference.) While I was there, I was able to get a foot-zone. It felt amazing. I was able to get some pressure relieved off of them and was able to have energy work done for both my baby and myself. After that, I went home and took a nap, got some food, and relaxed the rest of the night.

We didn’t realize that night would end up being the beginning!

Just another quick, little post tonight…

I will try my best to post at least 2-3 posts a week. But, there will be those times that I will not be able to do so. For instants, last week I had my brother up visiting me and I was busy spending time with him. So, I apologize in advance if I’m not consistently posting things!! 🙂

Have a wonderful night, All!

Jessica

Good evening, everybody!!

So, just this past Sunday, Brenden was given the opportunity to have a new calling in our ward. Well, technically, our Bishop called us in to his office and extended the calling to him unorthodox. He is now the official, new, and greatest Executive Secretary to our bishop! Meaning… He is basically “married” to him because they communicate ALL THE TIME about meetings, checking up on people, organizing the bishops whole schedule when it comes to anything related to our ward and the people in it! I support him fully! 😀 I am excited to see what this calling has in store for both him and I and our family.

When our bishop was called to be our new bishop a couple months ago, Brenden found out that he was in the medical field. He got super excited about that. He quickly found out that our bishop was also way into cars! So funny, because we are too! There were several other things that we found out about that we had in common, and felt that we would get along with him very well, very quickly.

I know that Brenden being in this calling is going to take him away from being at home a bit more so than he already is, but I also know that Heavenly Father will bless our family for him accepting this calling and fulfilling his duty. Brenden really is such an incredible and spiritual man. I am so blessed to have him as my husband. I learn so much from him every single day! If I make it to the Celestial Kingdom, it will be because I was hanging onto the tail of his shirt! Haha!

Church callings really are a blessing to us and our families. When we receive a calling to serve in the Church, it is something that Heavenly Father has asked us to do to help us grow as well as help serve others. There are a lot of people who are more than happy to get a calling in the Church, but once they get it, after doing what is supposed to be done for a few weeks, sadly they quit fulfilling their full responsibilities. I will admit, I am not the best at fulfilling my callings 100%. I need to do a lot better. But, I do try to do what I can when I am doing it.

Several years ago, I used to be a primary teacher to the Sunbeams and CTR 4 class. This class was combined because there was only like 2 Sunbeam children in the class. It was probably one of my most favorite callings I have ever had. I love teaching children and helping them understand the Gospel and come to know our Savior, Jesus Christ, in a way that their innocent minds can relate and understand to. They are so humbling and taught myself so much about my Savior and His love for little children. Someday, I hope to be able to serve the children in the Primary program again. It was such a wonderful experience!!

To those of you who have callings in your ward/church, serve it to the fullest with the love of God. You will be blessed beyond measure. Don’t expect to receive anything back, because when you do it to help others, you will receive a love and happiness that cannot come in another way. That is a blessing in itself. It will be worth the journey!

With love always,

Jessica

I am a Pinterest junkie. I have over 12,000 pins between all of my boards and still can’t seem to say that I have found enough things on there. I absolutely LOVE Pinterest. The creators are genius.

A couple weeks ago, Brenden and I sold our sectional couch. We are still currently looking for a couch that is just right for our family! Lucky us, we get to sit on the floor, our camp chairs, or my rocking chair in the mean time!

One of my boards is called Home and Design. I also have one called Craft It Up. On there I have tons of different decoration ideas for my home. One of the things I have on there are DIY Pallet Couches. I don’t know how many of you have heard of these, but they are super cute and super cheap!!! If we weren’t living in an apartment right now I would be ALL OVER making our own pallet couch. I also don’t have all the tools I need to make one right now.. But someday I will make one!

Here are some other ideas for you guys for either indoor or outdoor seating areas, coffee tables, and other decor! All of these links have multiple options for you to create a pallet something!

http://www.dose.com/lists/19083/26-Ways-to-Use-Pallets-to-Create-Some-of-the-Most-Chic-Furniture-in-the-Market-ab630-2

http://palletfurniturediy.com/pallet-furniture/30-diy-furniture-made-from-wooden-pallets/

http://diycozyhome.com/pallet-sofa-projects/

http://paintedfurnitureideas.com/what-to-know-before-painting-a-wood-pallet/

http://lovechicliving.co.uk/upcycled-interiors-10-pallet-ideas/

http://www.sheknows.com/home-and-gardening/articles/993651/cool-backyard-diy-projects-from-around-the-web

If you decide you want more ideas, definitely check out Pinterest! There are literally THOUSANDS of topics and ideas on there! And for all you men out there…. Pinterest also has TONS of guy things on there as well. From cars and man caves, to music and sports! 🙂

Have fun and enjoy creating!!!!

Warm Wishes, Jessica

So, my hubby is such an amazing man! I don’t know how he does it. He is a full time student, this past semester having taken 13 credits, and works 40-50+ hours. Thankfully, it is summer break for 7 weeks, but he still has to work in the meantime. We have been trying to figure out a way to get him in a different job so he wasn’t working so much, had time to study more for his classes, spend more time with our son and I, etc. But for him to find something that he doesn’t have to work at so much and make the kind of money that we need to pay our bills is basically non-existent.

We have looked into different kinds of SAHM jobs that I could do to help bring in some extra income, without having to send our baby to daycare or be babysat all day. I’ve looked into a ton of different MLM jobs that I could stay home with, some being very intriguing, and after praying and talking about it, do not feel right to start doing.  Its very hard and frustrating when you’re trying so hard to take the load of your husband so he isn’t working as hard and isn’t as stressed.

Several years ago, I went to cosmetology school and graduated with 2000 hours. I have an active cosmetologist/barbering license in Utah. I don’t currently practice it unless family or friends ask me to do their hair for them. Recently, my husband and bishop have been trying to convince me to start doing it again and get my license transferred to Idaho. I am currently working on figuring that part out, but its kind of a pain in the booty! I am hoping that I can get that transferred to Idaho here soon, but I recently heard that Idaho is not going to be taking Utah licenses soon, if its not already in place, because Utah has changed their hours. This means that my license will easily not qualify as a full 2000 hour license here soon. Here’s to hoping that I’m not too late!

Behind the scenes of all of this…. My husband is in school to become a PA. We are hoping that he will be completely done with school in 2018. During PA school, they highly encourage and ask the students to not work and to dedicate all extra time to studying and homework. We have been trying to decide what to do during that time for having an income. Do we take a loan out so we can live and survive? Do I put my child in daycare or have a nanny come babysit him every day while mommy is gone and works all day? What do we do?????

I will admit, I am not the best at saying my morning prayers or studying my scriptures every day…. But I really do try to stay close to my Heavenly Father and rely on Him. I know I need to do better at these things to help my faith increase even more so. I want my children to know that I love my Father in Heaven and Savior, Jesus Christ. I want them to see their mommy close to Them.

I’ve been trying really hard to have faith that everything will work out, no matter how hard and trying things get. That we will be able to have sufficient for our needs. That I will be led to the right SAHM job so I can be a full time mommy as well as bring in extra income. That the stress and weight will be lifted off of our shoulders. Honestly though, its been hard. I’ve been struggling to stay positive and have faith that we will be okay. That (I) will be okay, even when my spirit knows that it will all work out.

So, how do we practice strengthening our faith in God? Besides the primary answers to always pray and read your scriptures, that really are super important and necessary!

Neil A. Andersen said, “Challenges will come to you, but as you trust in God, they will strengthen your faith.”

L. Tom Perry said, “One of the greatest weaknesses in most of us is our lack of faith in ourselves.”

Deiter F. Uchtdorf said, “If you feel small and weak, please simply come unto Christ, who makes weak things strong.”

President Thomas S. Monson said, “The Lord is in the details of our life.”

And Bruce D. Porter said, “Don’t let your faith dim in the storm of life.”

There are a lot of answers that could answer this, but the one I am talking about would be exactly said in the quotes. We MUST come unto Christ. He is the only one who can lift our burdens and make us stronger. The more that we rely on Him, the more we will grow in testimony, faith, love, happiness, and trust. He will never leave us alone. He wants to see us happy and successful with our lives. What is important to us is important to Him, no matter how small or big it is that we want. (Of course it being good and righteous.)

Life comes with trials and struggles. We can’t go through life without them. But, we have access to the most powerful source to help us through those times. We can’t expect to do it on our own or only have Him help us where we want or when we want Him to.

As we all go through this journey in life, may we take it one day at a time and keep the Lord apart of it. Not just a little here and a little there, but constantly throughout every day. He wants to be apart of our life and know what is going on. I hope and pray that He will help strengthen and uplift me during my trials and hardships. I don’t expect Him to make it all better right then and there. I do know that He will help calm my burdened heart.

May our Father in Heaven and Savior, Jesus Christ, always be with you.

With Love, Jessica

I was inspired to create this blog for a couple of reasons. First, while I was on Facebook earlier today, I was reading on one of the home-school groups I am apart of. There was a lady on there who had posted about how she wants to start teaching her children to memorize The Family: A Proclamation To The World. I thought that was a great idea! I want to teach my children to memorize the Proclamation as well as scriptures (the Book of Mormon, Doctrine and Covenants, Pearl of Great Price, and last but not least, the Bible), The Living Christ, General Conference talks, etc, that might help them build a stronger testimony and be firm in the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

A few minutes later, a good friend of mine posted about how she is teaming up with another fellow blogger, doing a “Spiritual Bootcamp” for several days. Each day, they would be posting about how we can strengthen our faith and testimonies in the Lord, Jesus Christ, how to come closer to and know Him, being more consistent in reading the scriptures daily, getting more out of General Conference, etc. Today was Day 2. She posted a phrase in The Family: A Proclamation To the World that says,

“Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities.”

That sentence is full of eternal wisdom and guidance. It could be dissected into its own blog series! Giving me another purpose for writing this blog! I’m so excited!!

Lastly, I also want to write about the every day life. Cooking, cleaning, DIY crafts / projects, personal mommy vents and successes, activities with the family, and anything else that I can think of!

I hope that as you read my posts that you can find inspiration, ideas, feel the Spirit, understand that you are not alone in whatever you may be going through, and you have a friend in me.

Best Wishes,

Jessica